It sometimes seems that many non-trans persons have a stereotype about trans persons: that
we want typical male + female relationships, and some may even feel that our gender identity
is a way to "normalize" what non-trans persons often misunderstand as "same
gender" relationships. Of course, we know that is not the case, that gender identity is
not superficial but is who you are in your core being, and that gender identity and sexual
orientation are two completely different things. Your identity is who you are, and your
orientation is who you love, in all the ways one can love another.
Along with that stereotype, which ignores the enormous diversity in the trans community, many seem also to not acknowledge the range of sexual activities that trans persons may engage in.
Trans persons' attitudes toward sex can range from plain vanilla to full on kink, and in that way we are no different than anyone else. Some of us may aspire to the hetero-normative standard monogamous arrangement of man + woman, while others will explore a wide variety of activities and arrangements. This page explores various activities that many persons—trans or not—participate in, and some of the things trans persons need to be aware of to stay healthy and sexually active.
The activities listed here describe oral sex, front penetration, and rear penetration. Sex organ names conform to identity, so boys have a penis regardless of the size or shape, and girls have a clit that can be similarly diverse in characteristics. Anyone can potentially be penetrated from the front, and for the women this is called a vagina, whereas for the men we use front hole or bonus hole.
Cisgender partners of trans persons should understand these terms too! Be supportive and affirming of your partner—use the words they use, and ask if you don't know!
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